FOR THE MALE GAZE?

The ideologies behind what is done.

Too often, I battle this question in mind. And when I think aloud, my friends finally hear what I hide - realistically I want to shout my thoughts out loud and clear. 

But the question is why am I presented this way? And I can only say the least?

I am pushed behind the scene and the dominant voice is heard. I hardly appear in person but I hear the powerful’s voice. I wonder why I happen to speak but with such low voice that one can hardly notice it is me. And at times, I do not even see why I pay for the same space with the ‘ideal’, but I am only relegated to the back. And at their gatherings, I only appear polished, decorated and handheld like their brief cases. I am told to smile a certain way, stand in a particular way and when I want to move, I sure have to walk in a certain way. I am not called my name and that’s because I cannot share the same name ‘powerful’. And they all leave me to question; ‘who am I?’. ‘what is my real identity? Of what importance am I to my race? And by my race, I mean the only race- the Human race’.

The answer they say is with culture and institutions of culture and institutions of culture. But culture changes, why then are they hell bent on making me ‘the other one?’ I question. My kind and myself question when will we be called by our name, like we have our own identities? When are we going to be the voice that comes out from our own bodies; even on the screens? When will we be applauded for our workdone? I question. Why should I be sexy? Why should I be the side attraction for some product or service or some bonus they get for purchasing something, like the screens present?

My name is a Woman, I stand to be one! I matter, I am needed, I have a voice and I can speak for myself. I am not an object I am human.  

And before I sit down, I have been greatly surprised how everyone is mentally blocked to consider us as even alternative, talk less of the answer. The answers that kept coming were: the step father, nothing to the boy and the most amusing of them all is where they told me “the question is wrong”.  This is the question I posed:

“The boy is the biological son of the doctor, but the doctor is not the father of the boy. What is the doctor to the boy?”. The emphasis is that we are not for the gaze of nobody, we own our bodies, we decide what happens to us. 

To business owners, creative writers and artists, authors, editors, reporters and anchors- let us be very constructive and gender aware as we frame and create, the woman is no image for the male gaze.

Written by 

Veronica Agyiri